Thursday, December 16, 2004
Don't Cry for Me, Argentina
the STORY of Cervazo
Are you ready for a wonderful, sad story? It's all about a little girl who came to us over a year ago. Cervazo was our foster daughter, but now she's gone.
[dramatic pause]
well, sorry folks, but im not gonna tell the story. you see, i have to be careful not to let the STORY of Cervazo become larger than Cervazo.
[what exactly do i mean?]
well, these days i work with what's in front of me (the future, my surroundings) and i prefer facts (Friday: Just the facts, Ma'am). Feelings are fine, they come they go, I work to let them wash over me (remember SpongeBob - absorbent, and yellow and porous is he)
[why limited punctuation?]
*purely for dramatic and aesthetic reasons*
so, if i tell you my sad tale of woe (which it really isn't) about how lil Cervazo was ripped from our house after a year or so of raising her as our own, you really need to think further back, and imagine the scene at Cervazo's *real* home when she was taken from her birth mom, Merlot, and, by way of some agencies, brought to us. Same scene, but perhaps worse.
The *trick*, and im not saying it is easy all the time, is to keep Cervazo and her needs out ahead of everything else.
What I really want:That Cervazo may be safe wherever she is, and always be given the opportunity to live, grow and thrive.(if that sounds like a prayer, then perhaps it is)[are prayers just wishes in disguise?]-- Trans-Siberian Orchestra, from Christmas Eve and Other Stories, This Christmas DayIf Merlot can provide that, then she's a loving and competent Mom.
Let go the past, let go your preconceptions about how things SHOULD be and who deserves what. The Universe owes nothing to anyone.
[but that's not fair!]
who ever said the Universe plays fair? the Universe doesn't even understand the concept. Events just are. [feces precipitate]. devoid of meaning. devoid of emotion. devoid of names. [the tree doesn't know it's a tree]
[and no, i don't really like Madonna.]
what i mean is that im not in sympathy with some of her life choices, and im probably jealous of her fortune and fame, despite that.
but i do like her voice and some of her songs.
especially Vogue, as performed by the Chipmunks. check it out...
breathe.
evolve.
laugh.
evolve.
laugh.
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